this morning i watched the sunrise at the point and spent my time walking around and thinking. it was a cloudy morning, yet still beautiful. i couldn't help but think about jacom. it's weird, how people can be gone for so long and we move on with our lives and get accustomed to them not being there, and yet there are still those days where it's just tough and you just miss them. no matter how many talks you listen to, guiding words you read, or spiritual comforts you receive, sometimes you just shed a few tears over it and that's okay.
last night i watched elder bednar's devotional. the last few days i've been thinking a lot about jacom, and then to hear that talk... spot on. it's funny how that works. it hit very close to home. i know that it's okay that jacom isn't here anymore and that one day it will all make sense. i have faith that all the dots will connect and i'll be able to see the full picture one day, even if i don't see it now.
this isn't a post for me write about how sad i am, because i'm okay. sometime's it's just nice to write because it helps me remember.
i still miss him. i wish he was around for this part of my life. it'd be so nice to have him to talk to. to hear his brotherly advice.
i miss his humor. i miss his sarcasm. i miss his laugh. i miss him.
this is my favorite picture of jacom and my sister. he loved my sister so much. he was over the moon for her. it gives me hope that maybe one day i'll feel loved by someone as much as jake loved my sister.
that's a comforting thought.
with warmth & love,
lo
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