hello ecp.

this summer i had the opportunity to work at a daycare center.

most people get a summer job working as a lifeguard at the nearby pool. a nanny getting paid to watch 1-2 kids and enjoying the luxury of raiding the pantry. or possibly working at the local pizza restaurant as a waiter.

i worked all summer with about sixteen 2-year olds all day.

and i loved it.

these kids all have a special place in my heart. i'm not saying this job was easy at all, because it wasn't. but was it worth it? most definitely. i know i was the teacher for these kids, but they're the ones that really taught me this summer. they taught me to be fearless. to love. to forgive quickly. to smile at the little things. to run around the room acting like a dinosaur and it being perfectly okay. (it's okay to do that outside of the daycare center right?) 

not a day went by this summer where these kids couldn't make me smile. even on some of the worst days of my life, they still managed to make them a little better. and because of that i am forever grateful to these darling kiddies. 

i love you guys.

i miss you already.

oh and one more thing, don't think that i'm ready to have kids now by any means... this job was by far the best birth control anyone could ask for haha. but when the time is ready, i feel more confident that i won't fail as a mom. love you guys forever.

xo 

L

hello excitement.

i think i have a better grasp on what i want to do with my life!

this is going to consist of major changes.

yes, i mean big changes, but also literally changing my major?

transferring to a new school?

traveling?

but mainly, taking risks.

i'm 19. still so young. but this is the time to take risks and do something crazy. 

and the excitement is growing.

i'll keep you folks updated when i figure out more about what might possibly happen.

but as for now, i plan on changing the world.

L

hello adele.

watched the vma's tonight and yet again, i continue to be amazed by the wonderful adele. her voice is absolutely stunning and oh so soothing to listen to. tears filled my eyes as i watched her singing this song so gracefully. i wish i had the affect of being able to stand on stage and touch and move millions with my words and my voice. 

maybe one day. 

hello paying it forward.

we live in a cruel world. full of mean people. full of cheaters. liars. fakes. and backstabbers. 

but with that being said, we also live in a world full of kind-hearted people. people seeking good for others. and i think we need to focus on the good people in our lives and in the world. and focus on making ourselves better people. 

lately i've been trying harder to focus my efforts on other people. doing nice things for others. ever heard of the term pay it forward? it's when others do something kind for you, you in turn do something kind to someone else. i've had a lot of kind and wonderful people reach out to me lately, so i realized that it's about time that i do something kind for someone else. i've made a goal to do something nice for someone else every day. whether a stranger or a friend. no matter little or large the deed, something. 

there's no need for me to say what i've done or plan to do, after all, they're supposed to be anonymous deeds right? but, i will share with you one of them. today i grabbed some wendy's for dinner. while going through the drive through, i decided to pay for the stranger behind me in the drive-through line. when i told the cashier that i wanted to do so, he gave me the strangest look haha. "umm..sure?" i laughed and handed him the money. he replied by laughing in a bit of surprise and said, "do you know him?" "nope" "you're just doing it to be nice?" i smiled again, "just paying it forward" he smiled and replied, "wow, you're really nice" i laughed and as i drove off i took a quick glimpse in my rear view mirror to see the surprised look on the man's face in the car behind me. i hope he pays it forward now. i know paying for someones meal at a fast food restaurant isn't the biggest thing in the world, but it's better than nothing. and hopefully it's big enough that it made someone else smile. who knows what that stranger is dealing with in their life today.

so if you're reading this right now, pay it forward. do something nice for someone else.
it doesn't take that long to do something nice.
and it could make all the difference for someone else.
xo
L

hello hayden.

so there's this boy... :)

his name is hayden.

very charming.

extremely handsome.

can always make me smile.

gives the best hugs and kisses.

age 3.

i'm so happy that i've had my nephew around to make me smile. i've definitely needed him the last little while. tonight my family went to brusters after dinner for my dad's birthday. while we were waiting in line, trying to figure out what to get, hayden began to dance. and when i say dance, i don't mean just move his hips a little. i mean he went all out, breaking it down, head to toe. no shame of course. from the robot, to acting like a ninja, he went all out for a solid 10 minutes. everyone around couldn't help but smile and stare at this adorable kid, including myself.

this all got me thinking. how great it was to be 3 and have no shame. not a care in the world. the worst of our problems was being forced to eat our vegetables at dinner. i wish i could remember just how wonderful it was to be 3 and not have a care. which lead me to my next thought. why not act 3 for a little while? i have the rest of my life to settle down. now is the time to be crazy. to dance in line at brusters with my 3-year-old nephew. to travel. to take risks. to do whatever i want, even when it doesn't make sense. to live. 

so who cares if my sister and my parents spent the car ride home annoyed at hayden and i for screaming way too loud, laughing way too hard, and my 19-year-old self acting like i was 3 for a little while. at least i was smiling, and i know my family was happy to see that again. 

i don't want to settle down anytime soon. there are so many things i want to do. i want to get out of my comfort zone. i want to learn more about this crazy world and the life we live in. i want to find happiness again. and i think this 3-year-old is a great example of it.

L

hello kindness

there will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears.

and love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears.

get over your hill and see, what you find there.

with grace in your heart and flowers in your hair.

mumford & sons is seriously the best. ya know how everyone always says how taylor swift writes the story of their life? well i'm pretty sure mumford & sons writes all their songs for me. 

one day at a time. holding onto the hope that i will get over this hill.

if you're reading this right now, do something nice for someone else today. you never know what someone else is going through. even if you think you do, i can promise that you never know the full extent. and the little things can make the biggest difference. 

"be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle" -plato

L

hello sunday.

happy sunday to you all.

sunday's typically consist of being lazy, for me at least, and most everyone else too i think..

so that means today consisted of church, playing monsters vs. knights with hayden, playing lots of guitar, and looking up new music. 

my current favorite, alex winston. 

enjoy

xo

L

hello loss.

ever have those days where it seriously feels like it takes everything you have to get through it?
well i feel like i've been running a marathon for weeks now.

L